Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Study Break

Sorry folks, I'll be offline for a few days. In between parties and drinking, you just have to find time for study to get that "college experience" everyone keeps talking about...

Saturday, November 14, 2009

That Guy

As soon as you enter a party/bar/room you instinctively have an intense feeling of hatred towards a certain someone, even though you've never so much as seen them before. The reason: He is That Guy.



He's the guy that always has to be the center of attention, constantly yelling out obscene comments in the hope that some poor soul agrees with his sense of humor. Well I'm sorry, but cussing out everyone in the room just isn't quite what it used to be.

For some strange reason, That Guy is oblivious to the fact that they are making an ass out of themselves. To the contrary, in fact. They believe that the rest of the room is laughing hysterically at the crazy antics of this gift from God.

"Any examples?" I hear you ask. Well sure! Kanye, Jon Gosselin, Kanye, Richard Heeney, Levi Johnston, Kanye, Michael Lohan, Kanye...you get the picture.

Well folks, I have a new hatred for That Guy. Not long ago, a group of friends and I were watching an all important football game. We had wings, fries and drinks, in a room light up only by the plasma screen dotted around the room. All was well in the world of sport. It was nearly half-time, my team ahead of course, and That Guy had yet to make an appearance. Well the second half began and out of nowhere He appeared. Swearing at the players through the screen, excusable you'd think but not when he cheers for the opposing side, merely because the rest of the bar were supporting the home side. First mistake and second mistake, douche.

There were a mere 20 minutes left on the clock, and my homeside were blistering in attack. Unfortunately they were unable to connect, due to some rather impressive defense from the opposition. Every opportunity that my team took, the bar would fill with silence, waiting in anticipation and hope. Somehow, the opposition always managed to barely hold on. That's when Mr. Douche decided to play the That Guy card again.

"You suck! *******" were some of the more family friendly comments. This was no fan in rage at his own team's inability to convert play into points. No, it was That Guy trying to win an award for improv stand-up. At every tense moment of the game, the bar would fill with silence, apart from the obligatory "Get off the field! You F****ng suck!" from That Guy. By the end of the game, we all wanted to pound him.

Unfortunately for Douchey-Douche bag, we claimed a well deserved victory that night. And as soon as we did, the place was suddenly filled with a vacuum of space, as people rushed to the exits in order to celebrate somewhere where That Guy wasn't.

Well folks, I'm sorry to say that that task is impossible. Wherever you go, That Guy will follow. Wherever you stand, he stands. Wherever you party, he parties.

So next time you see That Guy, give him a good punch from the rest of us. And another for all the other douchey acts that he is bound to engage in.

Until next time...

P.S.
Don't laugh at the players name douche bag. It just makes everyone wanna give you a pnch in the face.

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Go And Hug A Tree (I Love It)

I don't usually catch many episodes of South Park but every once and a while there's an episode that goes viral. It becomes the new water-cooler topic of the day, or the vodka handle topic if you're in college. There was the Chewbacca defense, Vote or die and the gay fish. Now, Trey and Matt have blessed us with Whale Whores. Enjoy.

Friday, November 6, 2009

Halloween '09 - America's Favorite Holiday

After almost a week away from the blogosphere, I have returned to give you your next fix of random musings.

First off the bat, Halloween '09. No that's not Michael Jackson/Patrick Swayze returned from the dead and multiplied a million times over. And no, that's not Kanye drinking all your alcohol and obnoxiously abusing every female that walks past. Its Halloween!

The only night of the year when persons of the female persuasion can go out in nothing but lingerie, or less if they so desire, without anyone being able to call them a skank/whore/slut. Its that day where everyone gets a free pass to do/wear anything their heart tells them.

Gone are the days of roaming the streets knocking on doors for candy. Instead we're roaming the streets, blind drunk, looking for the next party to crash. So much has changed since our innocent eyes saw Halloween as a day of candy and costumes. Except for the costumes that is. You can guarantee that if it fit when you were five, it can fit when you're 20. In fact, it may have a little too much fabric, so go ahead and cut that bottom inch off that dress Snow White.

From this:

To This:


And, believe it or not, everyone thought she was prude because her costume covered up too much.

In the mean time, I'll let you sleep off your alcohol induced comas that you're all bound to be still in.

Until next time...

Monday, November 2, 2009

The Early Bird

Like a lot of you out there, I'm at that time in my life where getting up is more of an option than a choice. It's a luxury that we all envy when we don't have it, and abuse when we do have it. But, amidst the great relaxer that is sleep, there lies a curse. You know what I'm talking about. It's just gone past noon and your eyes slowly begin to open, taking in the world that's been awake for the past few hours. You groggily contemplate getting up or lying in bed, hopelessly trying to fall back asleep to no avail. After a few minutes of the latter, you decide that its finally time for the world to see your hungover face again. You take a shower, but feel lifeless and unenergized for the remainder of the day.

Therein lies the curse that is the sleep-in. It seems to me that the more you oversleep, the more tired you feel throughout the day. Catch 22, sucks doesn't it? Well suck it up! Not everyone can stay out partying till 3 am, on a Tuesday might I add, only calling it quits because you don't want to miss that all important human psychology class the next day.

Today, unlike all of you out there, I got up at the break of dawn. But sadly it was not by choice. It wasn't even one of those "Ugh, I have to go to [insert lame class here]". No, ladies and gentlemen, it was my alarm clock playing a cruel and unusual punishment on me, in retaliation for all those years of me slamming my hand down on that snooze button I suspect. I set my alarm clock for a reasonable 6.30 (yes am, and don't ask why) and all was well when I got up at 6.30 the next day to take a shower. At least, that's what I thought. Little did I know that it was merely 5.30! My clock had played an elaborate prank on me!

Needless to say I was not happy, and could not fall back to back to sleep because i had already taken a shower. Surprisingly, I was feeling energetic and upbeat, especially since I had only fallen asleep a meager 5 hours beforehand. And we all know that students need at least 12 to survive. While I'm not suggesting you all get up at 5.30, I do think that you should all consider waking up just a little bit earlier every once and a while. Who knows...maybe, like me, you will find yourself with more energy.

Thursday, October 29, 2009

Vindication

Some of you may have thought my previous criticism on Miley Cyrus was a little harsh. Some may have thought that it was perfectly justified. While others may have just thought that i was simply wasting calories by even talking about her. Well to those of you that chose the latter two, I agree. And to those of you who were firmly in the Disney camp, well I'm sorry, but the world says otherwise.

In a recent poll conducted by AOL, 42% of the 44, 594 tweens polled voted Miley Cyrus the "Worst Celeb Influence". Miss Montana beat out competition from Britney Spears (at least she has an excuse...mental breakdown anyone?) with 27%, Kanye West with 19% and Vanessa Hudgens and Shia LeBeouf with 9% and 3% respectively. But in all fairness, what kind of kid is expected to know how to spell "Shia LeBeouf"? Even I had to Wikipedia it.

Seriously, who would look up to this?

Miley Cyrus

Remind you of someone?

And believe me, that's one of the better photos that I could find.

Sorry Kanye, but you'll have to do better than interrupt someone's moment of glory to claim this award. Which was voted the Most Socking Moment of 2009 by 71%. On a related note, congratulations to Taylor Swift who was voted the best Female Artist, and yes, Miley Cyrus was up for this award also.

Stars from Twilight swept several of the other categories, with Selena Gomez taking out both the Best Celeb Influence with 30% over Swift's 28%, and the Favorite Female Television Star by a landslide.

Oh yeah, just in case you live under a rock and are surprised by the results when you hit the link, vampires are oh-so-hot right now in the tween world. Well, everywhere actually.

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

Timeout

I'd like to take time out from the obligatory end of years lists, and my busy life atm, to plug the new song by Weezer and Lil Wayne (aka Dwayne Michael Carter Jr, thank you Wikipedia). That's right Weezy + Weezer! And you now what that equals? Well they Can't Stop Partying of course! It's a shameless, embarrassing tune for both of these artists, but it its oh-so catchy and is sure to get your soon-to-be-frozen feet moving to that beat. It's got all the makings of an underground dance hit. It's catchy, got great bass, it's pop with just a dash of rap (so hot right now) and the lyrics are terrible, something a child could come up with. That is how you make a semi-hit that people only really listen to in a party or club. Well done Weezy-er (see what I did there), you have a song that is sure to make its rounds on the turntables this fall/winter.


Monday, October 26, 2009

The End is Nigh

As we draw closer and closer to the end of the first decade of the new millennia, it is only fit to list what this inaugural decade was about. But first off, give yourselves a pat on the back ad a round of applause, you survived the predicated Armageddon, or apocalypse, I'm not to fussed. That means one of two things: you're awesome or you're evil and deserve to suffer for eternity. I prefer the former myself.

Enough with the self-congratulatory rituals, let's get on with this list....after the break. Sorry folks, but my studies await, so until next time.

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

The Year of the...

Seeing as how I've already listed the five worst songs of 2009, it makes sense to list the five best songs of 2009. Well suck it up, because I don't make a lot of sense. Instead, I present to you the artists who defined this year (aka Most Influential Artists). This list is going against the norm..."why" I hear you ask. Well, my dear friends, it's because it only consists of four artists, not the usual five, ten, 20 or 40 (who decided those amounts anyway). Welcome to the revolution of lists:

  • Disney
As much as I politely dislike Miley and the crew, it would be impossible to not include her on this list. This year was the year tweendom truly took off. Disney stars such as Miley, Demi Lovato, Selena Gomez, even the Jo-Bros. Well down tweenies, you are number 4 on the list.

  • = Taylor Swift
  • = Black Eyed Peas
Who can ignore the record breaking Boom Boom Pow or I Gotta Feeling. With millions of songs sold this year, and a trail of broken records in their wake, the Black Eyed Peas enter the list at second equal. This year has also been a fairytale story for Taylor Swift, riding the success of last year's release Love Story, Taylor took the pop world by storm, releasing You Belong With Me. Kanye's outburst at the VMAs only guaranteed Taylor further success and reaffirmed her good girl image.

What list would be complete without...
  1. Michael Jackson
Michael's place in this year's most influential artists was a shoo-in but I ad a difficult time deciding on his placement. But I couldn't ignore the posthumous media frenzy surrounding him and the record breaking sales of several of his albums and singles. He truly influenced the recording industry for the better and the fact that he was loved by so many people around the world was the deciding factor. If Taylor or one of the B.E.P.s passed away would there have been as big a media hype around their deaths? Would their albums and singles break records and reenter music charts around the world and take up the majority of the top 40? Congrats Michael...

That was this year's Most Influential Artists awards, stay tuned for more.

Saturday, October 17, 2009

Welcome to Rock Bottom

I've decided to put you out of the misery you must have been suffering, waiting in anticipation ever since my last post. Well the time has come to release my first of many lists. Since we save the best for last, its only appropriate that we start with the worst songs of 2009...hell the worst of the decade.

5. Hoedown Throwdown - Miley Cyrus

Was this a serious attempt at a single? Seems like a parody Weird Al would of put together of an imaginary attempt by Disney/Miley of merging country with hip-hop. I mean "Countrify it"!!! No! I REFUSE. And don't get me started on the rap Miley released about Twitter...

4. Crack a Bottle - Eminem

"So crack a bottle, let your body waddle" really? REALLY? No Eminem, this is not "the moment you've all been waiting for".

3. The Climb - Miley Cyrus

I swear, if i ever have to listen to this cat-screeching, terrorist-attack-on-your-ears excuse for a song, I'll go postal.

2. We Made You - Eminem

Even the Palin bashing can't save you Marshall. You're a year too late for that one.

1. Party in the USA - Miley Cyrus

Another mind-numbing, generic, meaningless song, with the Disney factory stamp of approval. Ugh...Miley.

Special Mention
  1. Good-bye Twitter - Miley Cyrus
It's "Goodbye" FYI, Miley. A search of "good-bye"on the Oxford dictionary returns this result. And your name comes up with that red underline thing! It's not even a name! And if you're going to delete an account, don't make a rap about it. No one cares! Let those 2 million lemmings cry about it. This article sums up my feelings beautifully.



You may have noticed that out of the thousands of songs available to be selected for this list, it only consisted of two artists. Well, let's just lay down the criteria for selection:

  • Must have been released within 2009; OR
  • Must have reached its height of popularity/infamy within 2009;OR
As you can see, I am not the biggest fan of Miss Cyrus. I wouldn't even pirate one of her songs. She is an untalented, bad role model, auto-tune Disney Barbie. I mean, if you want to be a role model to tween girls, don't pose topless in Vanity Fair! Don't take photos that will cause controversy if they were to be leaked! As if that wasn't bad enough, don't turn up to the Teen Choice Awards in shorts that could be mistaken for underwear and whatever you do, DON'T pole dance in front of millions of tween girls. That is, unless you aim to be Hef's next girlfriend, which wouldn't surprise me, frankly.

BTW, "frankly" I wonder what frank ever did to get his name put down like that in history.

All in all, Miley is just another product of the Disney factory. She's what economists call a demerit good. She's overproduced, over consumed and socially undesirable.



Friday, October 16, 2009

Let the Lists Begin

We are approaching that time of year again. The time when bloggers, t.v./radio stations, newspapers and all forms of media release their end of year lists. Each issuer of the list thinks that their list is the most important and only correct list of of the millions of others out there. And this year isn't just any ordinary list, oh no. We're celebrating the end of a decade (thats ten years, and you call yourself a college student), so its gonna be a big one. I'm just thankful that in 1999 my young, prepubescent and carefree mind wasn't aware of the frenzy that is the end of year list. It must have been madness. So, to preempt the results of every other list out there, I will produce my own, no-nonsense round-up of the previous year, over the next few posts. Hell, even the previous decade if I can be bothered.

Without further ado, let the listing begin.

Monday, October 12, 2009

This Is It

With the recent posthumous release of the song "This Is It", sung by the late Michael Jackson, the hype around his life and works has kicked up ever so slightly, though not to the same Everest heights that we were exposed to 4 months ago. Since this blog was still an egg in the world wide womb at the time of his death, now is the right time to pay tribute to the man himself. Like him or not, just like George Bush or Mahatma Gandhi, you can't deny the huge effect he had on the world. His music was blasted around the world for 45 years, breaking down the walls of racism, discrimination, cultural and generational barriers. He was the first black artist that received regular airplay on MTV, albeit only after his record company threatened MTV for not playing his songs because of his race. Ironically, without Michael, MTV would never have survived its infant years, nor would Michael have the huge impact that he did had MTV not existed.

His music touched the hearts of billions around the world. From East Berlin to the slums of Brazil, when Michael sung, the world listened. The reason why his music was so universally appealing was because of the cross-genre style of his music. From slow ballads to rock songs, hip-hop to dance, R&B, pop, you name it, Michael mastered it. It was not only his music which held the world in awe, but also his dance moves. The world had idols before Michael, such as Presley or Buddy Holly, but his moves mesmerized and hypnotized the world, holding us in a trance while he danced away. He glamorized the Moonwalk, a move that will forever be attributed to the King of Pop. Michael's revolutionizing of the music video into an art-form, a short film of sorts, allowed his audience to watch Michael twirl, grope and dance across our screens and hearts.

Looking beyond his contributions to music, Michael's contributions to the world can be seen through his philanthropic work. Michael contributed millions upon millions of dollars for tens of different charities, even setting up his own Heal the World Foundation. Michael funded these philanthropic acts through the hundreds of millions of albums sold, making him the highest selling artist of all time. Michael is in no danger of losing this title with the upcoming release of the This Is It album to accompany the film.

While the day Michael died, might not have been the day music died, it certainly was the day the world stood still to pay tribute to the man who revolutionized the world of music.



Friday, October 9, 2009

Marge Bares All

America's longest running sitcom, animated program AND longest running primetime entertainment series has changed forever. The show which people all over the world have fond memories of putting their feet up, clearing their cluttered and stressed minds, as the world paused for a glorious half-hour, to delve into the strange four-fingered world. The well-loved series began as a sketch on the Tracy Ullman Show, later becoming its own series in 1989.

From cartoonist Matt Groening's mind, the world was introduced to the colorful Simpson family, consisting of Maggie, Marge, Lisa, Homer and Bart. It was a gift that the world embraced openly, the show becoming an instant hit. Its place in pop-culture was cemented, even being referenced by then President George H. W. Bush. Bart's catchphrase "¡Ay caramba!" became a household fixture, and commonplace throughout society. However, it was father Homer Simpson's catchphrase "D'oh!" which the world embraced with open arms. This love for the catchphrase couldn't be ignored forever, and was finally introduced to the New Oxford Dictionary of English in 1998. In 2001, this same catchphrase was added to the world's most respectable dictionary, the Oxford English Dictionary.

The show has made a huge impact on the world, but today an announcement was made which shook the world over. Today, it was announced that our beloved second mother, Marge Simpson, was to pose for the gentlemen's magazine Playboy. Not only is Marge to pose for the magazine, but she is to be featured on the cover. It is hard to ignore the impact that this successful series has had on all of us is undeniable, and we can only speculate what the world is going to be treated to next as the series enters its 21st season.


Tuesday, October 6, 2009

Essence of Life

What is it that makes life worthwhile? Is it the birds chirping away, waking us up at the perfect moment? Is it holding your significant other's hand and staring into their eyes? Or maybe its sharing a few cold drinks with friends, while sharing a few laughs and stories. Well if you answered yes to any of the above questions, you're sadly mistaken. After years of intensive scientific research and calibration, physicists have discovered that the essence of life is none other than music. Don't try and dispute that and say I'm lying unless you have you PhD handy for me to inspect. Would I ever lie to you?

How does it feel to realize that the essence of life is being handed over to you through the radio by Miley and the rest of the Disney crew. Its sad, isn't it. That a sixteen (seventeen?) year-old girl by day, but a singing sensation by night gives your life meaning. And btw, we're on to you Hannah. The same music that makes you want to tear your hair out to cover your ears with, in a lame attempt to drown out the terrorist attack on your ears that is the pole-dancing Miss Cyrus, gives your life meaning. I'll bet that makes you feel happy inside.

But just in case you still hate little old Miley (and who can blame you...she's on the same path that Lindsay followed) here's a run down of the top ten hits from around the world:

United States
  1. I Gotta Feeling - BEP
2. Down - Brit singer Jay Sean ft. America's own Lil Wayne, not yet released in Jay Sean's homeland
3. Party In The U.S.A. - Miley Cyrus (shame on you for buying this)
4. Run This Town - granddad of hip-hop Mr Jay-Z, Rihanna, Kanye Imma-let-you-finish West
5. Whatcha Say - newcomer Jason DeRulo
6. You Belong With Me - Taylor Swift (Kanye outselling Taylor...for shame)
7. Paparazzi - the *unique* Lady Gaga
8. Use Somebody - 35 weeks later and still going strong, Kings of Leon
9. Obsessed - Mariah Carey
10. Empire State of Mind - Jay-Z ft. Alicia Keys

UK
  1. Break Your Heart - Taio Cruz
2. Empire State of Mind - Jay-Z ft. Alicia Keys
3. Sexy Chick/Bitch - David Guetta ft. Akon (P.S. I can find the words without being disrespectful, and a little hint Akon, bitch in't one of them)
4. She Wolf - Shakira
5. I Gotta Feeling - BEP
6. Run This Town - Jay-Z , apparently Rihanna, Kanye West have been relegated to features in the UK
7. Sweet Disposition - Temper Trap, a great Aussie indie group, I suggest "Fader"
8. Boys and Girls - Pixie Lott, also known for Mama Do (Uh Oh, Uh Oh), let's categorize her as...soul-pop
9. Hotel Room Service - Cuban-American Pitbull
10.Dirtee Cash - Dizzee Rascal, virtually unknown in North America but huge in the Commonwealth and Europe

Ireland
  1. I Gotta Feeling - BEP yet again
2. She Wolf - Shakira
3. Sexy Chick - David Guetta ft. Akon
4. Break Your Heart - Taio Cruz (a Brit singer)
5. Empire State of Mind - You know already
6. Run This Town - Don't act like you don't know
7. Hotel Service - Pitbull
8. Boys and Girls - Pixie Lott
9. Get Shaky - Ian Carey Project (talk about living in the past)
10. Last Request - Paolo Nutini (Scottish singer)

Australia
  1. Sexy Bitch - David Guetta ft. Akon (they actually use "Bitch" not "Chick" like frugal old Britain)
2. Like It Like That - Guy Sebastian (remember this guy? The first Australian Idol winner. The guy (get it?) the 'fro who performed on American Idol season 4)
3. Evacuate the Dancefloor - Cascada
4.I Gotta Feeling - BEP the obligatory song in every Top Ten
5. Meet Me Halfway - BEP
6. The Last Day on Earth - Kate Miller-Heidke (Australian singer)
7. I Know You Want Me (Calle Ocho) - Pitbull (that's Street 8 to anyone who doesn't Espagnol)
8. Don;t Stop Believin' - cast of Glee
9. Good Girls Go Bad - Cobra Starship
10. Run This Town - You know who by now

New Zealand (what? They're an important English speaking country too)
  1. Sexy B**** - David Guetta ft. Akon
2. Down - Jay Sean ft. Lil Wayne
3. Sweet Dreams - Beyonce
4. I Know You Want Me (Calle Ocho) - Pitbull (damn he's doing well around the world)
5. I Gotta Feeling - BEP (*yawn*)
6.Oh My - Gin (Kiwi - they like being called that according to Mr NZ Prime Minister)
7. Tik Tok - Ke$ha (new artist on the list!!! That girl from Flo Rida's "Right Round")
8. Bulletproof - La Roux (electro-pop artist popular in the Commonwealth and Europe)
9. Evacuate the Dancefloor - Cascada
10. Run this Town - Jay-Z etc

Don't worry, I didn't forget about you Canada
  1. (a Little) Respect - Audio Playground (don't worry, even those crazy Canucks don't know who these guys are either)
2. Filthy Dirty Drunk N Roll - Ultraviolence (relax there Canada, leave the man-stuff to your neighbors to the South...and West)
3. I'll Go Crazy If I Don't Go Crazy tonight - U2 (why can't you just stick to normal songs, Canada?)
4. Paparazzi - Lady Gaga (finally, a normal Top Ten song)
5. Invasion of I Gotta Feeling - BEP (not even normal enough to buy the regular version of the song)
6. I Know You Want Me (Calle Ocho) - Pitbull
7. Bay of Pigs - Destroyer (just when you were getting normal, you had to go and ruin it all)
8. Celebration (remixes) - Madonna (really?)
9. Ghosts N Stuff - Deadmau5 (electronic group that also hit #12 in UK apparently)
10.Wither - Dream Theater

It's interesting to see the different songs from around the world that are big at the moment. There are a lot of big hits like "I Gotta Feeling", "Run This Town" and "Sexy Bitch/Chick" and a lot of localized talent. If there's one thing we can conclude from this, it's that Canadians have terrible taste in music. I mean "Whither", c'mon...

Monday, October 5, 2009

Ladies and gentlemen, its official, I feel about as old as George Bush must feel. And I'm not even talking about W, I'm talking about granddaddy Bush. Mr H.W. Bush himself, and that's old. Its that kind of old you associate forgetfulness, nonsensical and delusional with...either that or Bush junior. "Why oh why do you so old?" I hear you ask. Well it all stems back to damn procrastination getting one back on me. I was putting off study as usual (which, might I add, I desperately need to be doing) and what happens to appear on the ol' tube but a flashback to the top songs of a decade ago. That's right, its so long ago we aren't even measuring it in years anymore, it has its own measurement!

"What were the top songs of 1999" I hear you ask. Well first off, congrats for doing the math. That's more effort than 76% (trust me, its scientifically proven) people out there used. Well since you asked so kindly here it is:

10. Livin' La Vida Loca - Ricky Martin (thank God we're over him)
9. Nobody's Supposed To Be Here - Deborah Cox (please, we're more mature than that Jake)
8. Every Morning - Sugar Ray (the band not the boxer, silly)
7. Genie in a Bottle - the not so innocent Miss Aguilera
6. Kiss Me - Sixpence None the Richer (I know what you're thinking...worst name so far)
5. ...Baby One More Time - innocent lil' Miss Spears
4. Heartbreak Hotel - Whitney Houston
3. Angel of Mine - Monica (wth? Who is this)
2. No Scrubs - TLC

drum roll please...

  1. Believe - Cher

Some of those songs I have no recollection of whatsoever, i.e. Miss Cox and Monica, explain yourselves. My current theory is that they were so bad I blocked them out of my memory. The rest of the list is littered with songs such as "I Want It That Way", "Smooth" (by Santana and Rob Thomas, fool), Bailamos (Enrique Iglesias, don't pretend you don't remember if you're female), "Save Tonight" and a few more Backstreet Boys. But it hasn't been that long since we were jamming out to pre-crazy Spears or "Genie in a Bottle". And by jamming, I mean either playing out in the playground at school. I was only 7 or 8 when those songs came out! It's already been 10 years but it seems like it was just last year that those songs were being played to death. And I mean absolutely thrashed and played more times than Bush made a undecipherable comment.

It was the year the world was scrambling to fix the Y2K bug that was to end the world (thank you computer people), the last year of the 20th century, John McCain was still in his 60s and you could stroll onto any international flight with little question. The world has changed dramatically in the last 10 years but I remember it as though it were only a year or so ago. I remember being excited for the new century even though it changed nothing personally, I remember playing Playstation with my friends. It truly was a simpler time, for me anyway.

I hope this doesn't count as another nostalgic post, if it does, suck it up...

Until next time,
Bob

Thursday, October 1, 2009

The Trail of Memories and a Housewarming

Trail of Memories
As I enter my final few days of high school, I am left feeling somewhat hollow. Not Nixon hollow, as in I never achieved much and only left a trail of destruction, but more "Boulevard of Broken Dreams" or that oh-so-corny overplayed song (which some torturous soul always deems that it needs to be played upon entering a new rite of passage) "Graduation (Friends Forever)". In fact, as much as I hate it, that repetitious, whiny, overplayed pop-song embodies how I feel right now. I want to share a few lines with you, which pretty much sum up my feelings atm:
I keep thinking times will never change
Keep on thinking things will always be the same
But when we leave this year we won't be coming back

Before this schooling year began I hadn't really though much about moving on from the bubble that is high school, out into the somewhat real world. I call it the somewhat real world because i always planned on going on to college/university after high school. In fact, to summarize every action or adventure movie ever made, "He thought he had it all worked out, but little did he what was in store for him next". Thank you Indiana Jones for your insight into my life! I thought I would go to university, get a job (in business), settle down and eventually have kids. However, as my time in high school drew closer to an end, I began to question my life plans. I mean, what kind of kid has his entire life planned out from puberty (Michael Jackson (r.i.p.) and Chuck Norris exempt). I want to see the world, experience new cultures, and get out of this bubble of a country. This insight came to me just over a year ago, while visiting relatives, whom I hadn't meet before, overseas. We had never seen each other, yet we acted like we had been living together our entire lives. And when it came time to leave, I felt heartbroken inside because I knew that it was possibly the last time I would eveer see some of them.

But as the inevitable draws nearer to me, I am ready to accept my fate and move on. Last year, especially after meeting and leaving my extended family overseas, I wouldn't have been ready to move on from high school. I was scared, unprepared and unready for change. I'm still scared and unprepared for the huge change that is about to take place but to answer AC/DC I am ready. Just like Daniel Beddingfield, I "Gotta Get Thru This".

Housewarming
Now that I'm (hopefully) over with all this nostalgia, I'd like to thank a lil' lady that goes by the name K-Pop Addict (and yes, that is her real name, her parents didn't even give her a chance. Or maybe they did...I mean when was the last time you meet a stripper named K-Pop Addict. It was just that one time, right? Parents - 1 Stripper - 0.) We have our first blog follower!!! I know what you're all thinking, "Long time reader, first time follower" but get off your lazy asses and follow me. Or leave a comment. BOTH of which K-Pop did. I'm looking at you Jimmy. Put down that ramen and those textbooks and do something productive, like following me.

Bobby out

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Nostalgia here we come!

Me again,
Wow this past almost-week has flown by, making me ponder the time I have left in High School. To clear any confusion in the air, we do not run on the whole US semesters where I live, so unlike most you out there who are just getting into college/high school again, I'm winding down. In fact I've only got around 2 and a bit weeks before I complete my government funded schooling FOREVER. Massive student debt, here I come :(

A couple of days ago, my close-nit group of friends, plus a few, just hung out at one of my friend's house. Usually I would be complaining that it was lame, which it kinda was, but this time it was different. It just struck me now, as I was typing, that maybe it was because it would be one of the last times in our high school career that we would all be just chilling out together, without anything to worry about. Sure, we'll hang out between now and the end of school, as well as after, but it just kinda feels like the end of an era. Some of us are moving to universities across the country, others are just attending universities within our hometown, but all of us are going to experience a huge change.

I don't expect to continue the same relationships with some of them that I have now, purely because we'll slowly lose touch with each other. That's something that I find heartbreaking, I mean I've known these people for nearly half my life, some since I was a toddler. And some of these guys are the nicest people you will ever meet. I mean, one of my closest friends would give his limbs for each of us, without hesitation. Hopefully, and most probably, I will develop stronger relationships with new friends at college but I'm always going to miss the friends I have now, because no-one can replace them and the times we have. I'm 100% certain that in a year's time from now I'll be sitting here typing out how much I regret not keeping in touch with my high school pals.

Its not even just my closest friends that I'm afraid of losing touch with, its also those guys who I've spent every single day of the past couple of years in class with, and those guys who I'm get along with really well but don't hang out often simply because we have different social circles. In one of my classes we have all developed a strong bond with each other, after years of going to class, joking and playing around while we should be working, yet we all have different social circles. One of my friends said it perfectly some time ago when he said "Do you realize that if it wasn't for this class we wouldn't be as good friends as we are now". I think that what he meant, and we all knew but shied away from saying, is that if it wasn't for that class some of us probably wouldn't be friends at all. It's those types of things that I'm most going to miss about high school.

Finally, (hold your horses, I'm almost finished) its the sense of camaraderie that we experience in high school that I'm going to miss. I know that most schools don't have the same sort of brother/sister-hood thing happening at their schools, but at my high school we all sort of have this unspoken bond between us. Now, my school isn't the smallest, or by all means largest out there, but we all pretty much know the majority of the school by face. Or at least know the students within the few year levels above or below us. This comradeship is hard to define, so I'll give an example. Whenever I go out and see another kid that I recognize from school, we always at least do the chin and eye-brows up thing that guys do. You know what I mean, right? That thing that guys always do to acquaintances that they bump into but don't really have time/want to talk. Yeah, that thing. Anyway, that might not seem that brotherly to you but that is always followed by a "HEEEY!!! [Insert school name here]!!!!!". And that's at a bare minimum. That even happens to people who have never talked, or even dislike each other at school. Once, at a teen dance club thing, I saw a group of guys who are just destined to become those stereotypical douchebag party fratboys (I've got nothing against the Greek system btw, just some of those douchebags stereotypes) and we did the above routine and even chatted for a little. Now, I'm pretty sure some of them don't even know some of our names, vice versa, but our comradeship from attending the same school brought us together and eliminated those differences. This is a topic that barely ever comes up in conversation amongst my peers at school, but when it does, everyone always agrees that it is definitely there, and something which makes our school unique.

That is something I'll miss the most about high school

Thursday, September 24, 2009

Ready Set Blog!

Hello world,
Well this is my second, that's right second, attempt at starting a blog. The first one ended in a horrible disaster, similar to an ant flapping his/her (let's not be sexist here) wings with all the might that could humanly (antly?) be conjured up, in a vain attempt to fly off into oblivion...the ultimate failure. It came down after a single post and two weeks, all because of my lazy (yet productive) manner. Well you haven't got rid of me internet! I'm back with a vengeance and a lot of exams coming up, meaning only one thing:time to procrastinate like crazy.

Who is this mysterious, yet delightful creature i hear you ask yourselves. Well you can call me Bob, or Bobby if you so desire. But, just like that damn catchy Ting Tings song of yesteryear, "That's not my name". It's a pseudonym of sorts, or a nom de plume (insert fake accent here) if you wanna get French on us. It's scientifically proven, to become a famous writer/cultural icon, use a fake name. Just consider me to be the next Mark Twain, Pope John Paul II, King George VI, Prince or Michael J. Fox.

Enough about me, more about the blog. I am currently in my final (gasp) year of high school, soon to be moving onto bigger and better things, along with close to $100 000 worth of debt (yay...not). That's right folks, I am about to enter the 4 year period where you have a free pass to do anything you like, no matter how raunchy or illegal, which you can just shove into a shoebox under your box for the rest of your life. That's right folks, I'm becoming! (hold for laughter). All hilarious jokes aside (that's right, you all smirked, don't deny it), I'm heading off to university/college in a matter of months.

My perspective of this huge change in my life has changed dramatically throughout the year. At the beginning, I was freaking out, scared about what was to come. In fact, if I remember correctly, my first blog was about how I was "scared sh*tless" (censored cus everyone loves a GP rating) about moving on, even though I moaned about how over high school I was. Over the months that passed until today, I have become more accepting and optimistic about moving on, but also more nostalgic for high school. I mean, I've known most of the people at my high school for nearly half of my life, some since I was at preschool. But I'm ready for change, ready to start afresh in a new environment.

Watch this space